Finding Healthy Pleasure in S&M

Logan: A lot of people are curious about BDSM. What's it all about? And if I'm curious about it or we practice it is there something wrong with us? Ian: Wait, BDSM is? Logan: Bondage. Domination. Sadomasochism. So four letters mean a lot of different things to a lot of people. But BDSM doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. It is really about role-play and interchangeable power dynamics and getting to play roles you don't normally play in your everyday life. Ian: I absolutely agree. It is a lot of fun. You don't have to do a lot. You don't have to go too far. I think just introducing the concept mentally, you know. Especially for guys, I think when it comes to sex guys often feel like they have to be the dominate ones, they have to know everything, they have to be the ones in charge. And there is something really sexy, especially for a guy, about being able to submit a little bit. Logan: And very sexy for a woman who may not always take charge to totally take charge and be the dominate one. Ian: So it is really great to play with these power roles and to play with your imagination. I think it is also important to take things slowly. Logan: Oh, absolutely. This isn't just a pleasure and pain discussion. It is really important that above all else consent is a huge issue with BDSM -- making sure that you and your partner always have consent. That whatever you do and whatever your talking about, that you both agree to. You know people who are really practicing BDSM, they need safe words. You need words that you say that stop any kind of play and make it really clear. Ian: So if I say cumquat, stop it all. Stop everything if I say cumquat. Logan: If that's your safe word. So for now cumquat. And if you want more information or sex tips, check out more videos in this series.